The End

So here I am, a heartbroken girl writing about lost love. I know, I know. How cliche. But I suppose I knew it had to happen sometime.

It appears you and I have reached our end. One who is less blind than I could have perhaps foretold this outcome, but I was to headstrong to consider the possibility. Nevertheless, we have come to a close, whether by your volition or mine, I cannot say. Our story is over, the book shut, the empty page to remain as such. All this I have come to realize, though probably not come to terms with, but I don't know if I will ever be able to understand or forgive your behavior.

I was so sure, so completely convinced that, no matter what happened, regardless of all obstacles life put in our path, you and I would have a whirlwind romance. The kind of affair that stands strong and unshakable in life, the kind that laughs at death's jealous attempts to separate. Our love would be talked about among our loved ones, read about in stories, seen portrayed in plays and on film. A romance that would leave its mark on the page of history, that would make the whole world stop and wonder. How could it not?

But maybe a love like that is only meant for times past and storybooks. Or perhaps, more honestly, a love like that was never meant for you and me. After all, love does not boast and is not proud or envious. And most of all, love never fails.

So maybe I didn't love you. Maybe I was simply captured in the foolish daydreams of a child, the imaginings of a hopeless romantic. But I thought I loved you. And maybe that's all that matters; it is certainly enough to cause a fragile, fanciful heart to break when the realization that it never will be comes crashing down.

I recently read Persuasion and couldn't help but wonder if, many years down the road you and I will realize that we were always meant to be together. But no, the lovers in the story had the blessing of someone separating them; we have only ourselves to blame.

I know that someday, someone will come along and sweep me off my feet and you will be banished from my mind, nothing but a bittersweet memory locked in the deep places of my heart. Or maybe a quieter love will conquer me; it will gently walk beside me and sweetly grasp my hand, the reassuring hold of an unassuming love. I look forward to those future days of love, or even simple infatuation. But until then I wait while my heart tries to heal that which may not be mendable. And I will learn how to live with you no longer being a part of m life. A new, independent me with a life full of possibility, free of what was and what could have been, looking only to what could and will be.